Initiate Panic Mode

So I’m kinda graduating in 41 days…

There’s a lot of stuff to do between then and now. I actually have an entire document in MSWord dedicated to my To Do List. Wanna see?

That’s the motto of we theatre ed majors. I titled the page that way in hopes that it would motivate me. Sure did…and then Hurricane Sandy hit. And we lost power. For 6 days. Thanks unionized power workers. Knew we could count on you. Now I’m waiting for those even days to get gas…

Anyway, I lost a whole week of work time.  So where once I was calm, cool, and collected, now I’m flipping out for no apparent reason on minor annoyances. The election being thrown into the mix and my being scolded by multiple people for not voting certainly didn’t help. Elections really bring out the worst in people. My brother and a writer for put it best. It’s comparable to sports fans. The whole election is a sport, and once it’s over, people stop caring again. I was glad to have my little say on my Facebook and to defend my point. I even had a lovely talk with my friend Natalie answering her questions about my libertarian/anarcho-capitalistic views. It was a pleasant conversation because I wasn’t being yelled at and scolded.

Now what does this have to do with my panicking over school? Well I can tell you something else about myself: I’m rather emotional and empathetic. So knowing that people think I’m crazy and knowing that the world is such a mess right now because people came in droves to elect a war criminal for president (not that Romney is better), and knowing that I still have to do work in the field of public education that now hurts my heart, I can hardly work past stifling tears of frustration. (And no, this is not PMS.) Knowing that humans can do so much good, and WANT to do so much good inherently, but are stifled by institutions of indoctrination and old habits that simply cannot be questioned…it hurts me. And distracts me. Because I want to do good on behalf of them…but there are too many people blocking out my voice.

I’m still writing the play I mentioned a while back. I’m really looking forward to graduating and having time to write and work on my other blog that is still hidden but in the works. 😉 It’s not a political blog. It’s for theatre, and I hope that when it gets rolling it’ll be a lot of fun. And maybe I’ll feel better about everything else going on around me if I can make a difference in my small way.

That’s all.


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