I woke up from an absolutely amazing zombie dream. The only one I’ve EVER HAD! EVER! I was first by myself in a building surviving. I used the zombie guts to mask my hiding spot from other zombies. Then I saw people trying to hide from zombies too. One was a kid. So I went out of my way to protect them rather than just hide out where I was safe. So I let them and their group join up with me and I had to find us a safe place to stay. We started looking for a safe place in the building (maybe another building at this point?) and I was the leader and I was kicking zombie ass with a knife. Right in the brains! So we had one big final stand to clear out a big section of a building and some people died. It was sad, but we succeeded. Then I woke up.
So yes. It was like the 60 second bunnies version of the first three seasons of The Walking Dead. I was such a badass!
I spent today web surfing, listening to The Agony Family, washing my hair, and contributing to The Agony Family’s fundraiser. Yay! I love posting in TOTs! There’s always something I can write about! I feel like that constitutes a very productive day. It was followed by going back to work tonight, which is just more productiveness! Still didn’t have my gate key and I realized too late that maybe I could just ask for another one to borrow. By then the leasing office was closed. But I didn’t need it since the gate was open when I got back! And on top of everything, I made like $50 more than I thought I would last week! PAAAAY DAAAAAY LAST THUUUURSDAAAAY!!
Suffice it to say today was a significantly better day than yesterday. It’s really incredible how a few simple words from some special people can really turn things around when you’re in a bout of hysteria. 🙂 Don’t have a lot of friends, but I love the ones I’ve got!
Now I’ll just have to rebuild by resolve against sweets once again although I’m coming to yet another conclusion about that. I mean, I still need to build up my resolve. There are other ways I may go easy on myself. Hopefully as I build up my maturity and personal integrity, I’ll be more consistent with my health. I’ve realized that wasn’t the driving factor this entire time. Part of it, yes, but not the main part. When my maturity catches up from the 5 years of being stunted throughout high school and into college, I’ll be able to better focus on my health for health reasons rather than vain ones. Til then, I’ll keep jumping back on board when I fall off. And I will fall off.
Because in those moments when I still kind of have to convince myself of how good I look and feel, I’m on target and I can fall into good habits for a while like the week after my birthday. When my sensible side kicks in and keeps saying, “Damn guuurl! You know you fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnneee!” I seem to stop caring as much like when I didn’t have any unfrozen meat and caved to going out to eat. Because this girl knows she looks fiiiiinnnneee! 😉 It’s a matter of will 30 or 40 or 50 year old Brenna be as keen to listen to that vanity or will her priorities be significantly different than 23 year old Brenna’s? How far behind in my health do I want to be by then? Honestly though, last week when I was spot on, I actually did feel so happy and wonderful. That’s where the motivation needs to come from.
BACK ON TRACK!
- LUNCH: Salad
- SNACK: LaraBar, cookie pieces