I got another early to bed-early to rise morning! I’m loving this. I guess the only thing to figure out now is what to do with all of this day I have. Well this morning was easy. I went to the farmer’s market. It cost more than I hoped it would and I’m not entirely sure what I bought that bumped it up an extra $20. I’m almost afraid to look at the receipt in case it scares me away from all this goodness in my fridge right now. I think I’m ready for any meal or side through November! …okay, not November, but totally October.
After that I made lunch and had a chat with mama. Somehow I’ve brought my whole life into question once again from this simple conversation about pretty hair pieces and pasties. Maybe I want to make these neat little accessories. I’m no seamstress as I’ve said before. I’m no fashionista. But I do like feathers and bling. Rhinestones and glitter are the best! But as the day progressed (lunch was DELICIOUS! Although I think the brussel sprouts need some more oven lovin’.) and as I watched video after video on YouTube about DIY hair ornaments, I had to wonder why my interests jump from hobby to hobby so quickly without ever really delving into one. I wish I could do everything in the world, but as I look at everything in the world there is to do that I like, I get this sense like I can’t actually do anything. Bad brain, making me feel bad about myself.
There are lots of things I can do. There are lots of things I can learn. I haven’t quite figured out what’s stopping me from putting my heart and soul into any of them and saying “That’s my dream!” I mean, even as much as I adore theatre and the performing arts and teaching, I can’t be consistent with my blog. Doesn’t that say something about my interest in it? I don’t want it to because I’m very much interested in TOTs. I guess the question is are other people interested in what I have to share? Is there something worthwhile I can contribute? Or is each thing I attempt just another dead end for something else I will never be as talented at as other people?
So yeah. That’s where my brain hung out for a while today. What I’d like to do is flip that around into a challenge. Let me challenge myself to be good (and consistent) at something. Let’s explore what TOTs can grow into even if it is slowly but surely. Let’s explore what this crafting bug in me wants to share. Let’s stop laziness from ruining my NaNoWriMo planning. Because I like to teach. And craft. And write. So what if other people do it better? And who says I do it badly? Hah! Suck it, brain!
I guess what would have been more productive than sulking and dreaming of creating my own etsy with beautiful headbands and fascinators and brooches would be to get off my butt and start my door to door job search. Tomorrow for sure. (Just think of the narrating voice from Spongebob saying that.) Because I’ll be pumped after my exercise/burlesque class in the morning! Let’s make tomorrow super productive!!
In the meantime, I tried making today more productive. I did apply to another job. I’m sorry, but multiple applications were just not happening today. Not when my brain put me in such a mood. But at least I got through one. Better than none! #silverlining And then seeing how few dishes remained untarnished in my kitchen, I made dinner fit for a bowl. #bachelorettelife And then I watched Bride Day Friday on TLC. #marriedtoBenandJerrylife No, but really, I’m a girl. This is what I hear girls do. Less often do I hear about girls flipping back and forth between CNN and Fox…but I totally do that too. #getarealeducation
- LUNCH: Baked chicken, medley of roasted brussel sprouts, white potatoes and sweet potatoes
- DINNER: Beef and pork sausage in tomato sauce
- SNACK: Freezer fudge