“Fat Positive” is Heading for “Health Negative”

Can we talk for a minute, woman to world? I spotted a list of “fat positive” tattoos on Facebook that made me gag. Yes, my feelings were that strong and I’ll tell you why in a moment. The idea of fat positive is now in our vocabulary and personal responsibility has been ousted. “Live fat, die yum”? Seriously?

Growing up I was obese. I hit my top weight at thirteen. I was 209lbs on something like a 5′ frame. I was every fat stereotype: self loathing, hiding food, praying I could wake up thin and happy, physically and emotionally hurting. I was a fat girl in a skinny-hungry world and I did it to myself. Today I’m not skinny, but I’m healthier than ever.

My road to recovery has been tumultuous to say the least. I took small steps as a kid, cutting out candy and soda. As an adult, my brother helped me discover Primal health. Did you know there are faces to the Paleo/Primal movement who aren’t just slim size 4, but also strong size who-cares? It’s beautiful! To touch on all levels of health, I have also never loved myself as much as I do today. I’m happier in every respect.

Now with radical feminist interjection in our modern world and a hyped up sense of both entitlement and egalitarianism–both completely absurd–loving yourself has taken a turn for the worse. Body positive has become “fat positive”. Let’s understand what this “positive” idea is.

It's like Where's Waldo, but trying to find yourself. I'm not good at this game.
It’s like Where’s Waldo, but trying to find yourself.

Being positive towards something is accepting it, maybe even embracing it. It is an encouraging nature towards something. Body positive is wonderful. It only started coming to light for me when I saw burlesque ladies’ posts popping up on Facebook. Beautiful men and women of every size, height, race, and creed scrolled across my computer. I discovered Ms. Tess Holliday, a plus sized model and founder of #effyourbeautystandards. I stopped thinking of their supposed flaws and started pointing out attractive features. Well styled hair, bright eyes, laughing smiles, sexy poses, flattering clothes, charisma for days.

With that idea of positive in mind, fat positive is harmful. Let’s use the word fat according to advocates: it’s a word, a harmless adjective. Being fat is not something to hate, but it is also not to be embraced whereas being healthy or health oriented is despite your current size. Everyone knows the health risks of being overweight. Perhaps the risks are so recognized that concern over the health of fat people has now been demonized, and so someone like me won’t be taken seriously. It’s now discriminatory to mention health to them. They would probably even say I fat shame myself for living health consciously!

Feelings must be defended at all costs.
Feelings must be defended at all costs.

I understand. I am ignored by people who have found a scapegoat to let them pretend to love themselves and not necessarily strive for change. Personal responsibility is out the window, but it will haunt you. Yes, you can strut now, but at what cost to your later years? (I also understand that this unhealthy mindset applies to svelte people too, but something the fat positive advocates got right, based on the body positive idea, is that there is indeed a particular stigma against fat.)

Fat positive advocates expect the world to change for them instead of changing themselves. Public transport is discriminatory because standard seating is too small? *No, unfortunately your girth is too wide despite your sexy style. The insurance industry is discriminatory for charging more to those with obvious health risks? **No, your weight is an obvious risk. The workplace is discriminatory for considering your weight when hiring? No, if you struggle with tasks because of your weight, then your weight may be a liability. (By the way, if I’m defending public ANYTHING, you’re doing something wrong.)

Maggie and the Bedazzled Sleep Apnea Mask. She loves herself.
Maggie and the Bedazzled Sleep Apnea Mask. She loves herself.

Role models like Ms. Tess Holliday are fat and beautiful, at least in my eyes. According to her Instagram account, she incorporates physical fitness into her life, and that is awesome! The problem is asking to face the consequences of being fat (topped with entitlement). I worry that people look at such role models and think, “I don’t need to push myself towards health because women like Tess show me fat is beautiful.” Then they wind up with cupcake tattoos saying “Fat girl/boy”. I also worry people really believe the world needs to change for them instead of the other way around or paving their own path. Okay, let’s raise taxes to spend more money on material to widen all airplane seats. Uh huh. We’ll see how that flies…see what I did there?

This isn’t an attack on Ms. Tess Holliday or anyone really. This is a warning to the people who are paving the road to hell with their best intentions. The world owes you nothing just for being alive. Living, not stressing, with health and happiness in mind is what makes men and women beautiful. If anything is deserving of a “____ positive” following, it isn’t the fact that you’re fat, but rather your strength to be well.

*This is why everything should be privatized. Then the incentive may be there to accommodate fat passengers.

**Again, private insurance companies not impeded by federal law would have incentive to get you as a customer.

On Today’s Menu: Thursday February 13, 2014

Today was my last day off! Thank goodness! I’m actually pretty proud of how I could distract myself from the boredom eating. I only ate two snacks today. Woo! And I got just about all of my dishes washed, prepped lunch for tomorrow, did some Pinterest exploring. It was a good day off. I should go to bed early since heaven only knows how MARTA will run. Y’know, MARTA. My only means of rapid transit in Atlanta. The one that runs so inefficiently just when it rains, it’s a joke. Yeah, that MARTA.

Meh. I’m cynical. So sue me.

Highlights: I resisted the urge for take out for another day! In another 5 days I’ll allow myself take out again. Or I could see how long I can resist such a temptation and just see how far my groceries get me. Then I can just buy some more groceries. I may as well right? Either way it’s gonna cost me money so it ought to be money well spent. Unless I’m really craving a quick cheap meal. We’ll see. I did dishes! Oh and yesterday the boyfriend and I stopped Cthulhu from invading our world!! I rediscovered the Gaia Online avatar maker. That’s fun to play with! My snacking wasn’t so bad today. Only two snacks! And no chocolate or animal crackers!

Struggles: Y’know, the usual I-don’t-know-what-to-on-my-days-off kind of day. Also I hate when I have big fun plans for thing that 1) they are probably totally unrealistic and 2) I can’t really talk about these enormously cool plans since I’d look like a weirdo. All in good time, universe. All in good time. Pinterest will be my confidant until the time is right.

MENU

  • LUNCH: Hot dogs with a side of broccoli and cauliflower
  • SNACK: Apple, Larabar
  • DINNER: Chicken stir fry on rice noodles

On Today’s Menu: Tuesday February 11, 2014

I have a real problem with  getting stir-crazy. It actually motivated  me to get chore things done. That and an oncoming winter storm. I was even spurred to top off my tank and do some last minute shopping. Just meat and fruit/larabars. And Arkham Horror Part 1 with the boyfriend. Hopefully we can continue tomorrow if he’s not too tired and I still have power. Oh man I’ll be a sad girl if I lose power. Because the only canned thing I could get with my dietary restrictions is likely just the canned soup. Not that it wouldn’t be fun to spend the next few days noming so the food won’t go bad, but I can’t afford to run through my food that fast. Not after losing another 4+ hours for tomorrow in anticipation of the storm.

Highlights: Accomplishing chores. I vacuumed, I did dishes, I filled the quarter tank of gas that I used, and I got a couple snack groceries in anticipation of boredom eating. It’s bound to happen. I’d rather be prepared with good snacks than to eat the prepared meal foods. I cooked the big salmon fillet for dinner and had good stuff for lunch. I stared down the gluten free cookies and snacks and I said no. Boom! However, I may try some next shopping trip because I have a coupon! Oh. Was today supposed to be an IF day? Oooooo. About that . . .

Struggles: Occupying myself for the majority of the day when I’m not working is not fun. One thing I finally made myself do was attempt to clip the cats’ nails. Shana – no prob! Rose? Oh Christ almighty! I also struggled with my sugar intake today. A real fight at the store in the snack aisle. It was a bad idea to have those animal crackers yesterday. It’s also a bad idea to not have a contingency plan for when I’m off from work. Harumph.

MENU

  • LUNCH: Ham and spinach rollups w. pasta sauce (BAD combo – it tastes like a smoker’s breath!)
  • SNACK: Larabar
  • DINNER: Salmon fillet with broccoli and cauliflower
  • SNACK: Coconut milk ice “cream”

On Today’s Menu: Sunday, February 9, 2014

I won’t complain about a slow day so long as I’m prepared with sustenance. I shouldn’t complain about having an evening to myself, but I’m fighting the reasons why I did it. I guess the plus side is that The Walking Dead comes back tonight and to celebrate, I tried out a new recipe for breakfast for dinner.

Highlights: I am so excited about making ham rollups. They are super satisfying with a side salad and then a small snack. I actually felt too full for a little while. That was strange. I wonder if that has anything to do with my body recovering from BK dinner yesterday. Then I went and bought rice noodles for the stir fry frozen veggies I got with my Free Friday Kroger coupon. I’ll hold off on that for a while. I haven’t quite reacquired my taste for chicken yet which was going into the stir fry. My clean eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch came out pretty well. I got a bit overeager and put too much in the bowl. They’re pretty big pieces. I definitely want to try it with coconut oil like the recipe calls for. NEW EPISODE OF THE WALKING DEAD!!! This show, bros and brahs. I cannot handle this show. . .and yet I keep watching.

Struggles: I’ve got issues with social anxiety. It’s a real problem. Gets in the way of things. Fun things. Good times to be had. It’s a real shame. I also spent the day worrying about things that are probably silly, but you just never know. I don’t know. Nervous energy culminating into nervousness about the most obvious things. Also, MY HEART IS STRUGGLING WITH THE WALKING DEAD!!!!

MENU

  • BREAKFAST: Scrambled eggs
  • LUNCH: Ham, spinach, and cheese rollups
  • SNACK: Larabar
  • DINNER: Paleo Cinnamon Toast Crunch

On Today’s Menu: Wednesday February 5, 2014

Whatever the previous week has been, today was the antithesis of that. Soon as I posted that my week had been spectacular, who’s back to make their home in my bathroom? The m-f’ing ANTS!! Woke up with the plan to get dressed and run to Kroger before work to get Raid. Dead car battery. Waited 35 minutes for the (albeit super cool) AAA guy to arrive. At least I got some tea. Because I waited? Late for work. Oh, but no worries. I had to drive to work or my battery might die again. Stuck in traffic. 30 minutes late to work. Forgot to pack snacks. 5 1/2 hours to kill between work and dance class. Not enough gas to go home and come back. No Raid at the convenient stores in the area. Still can’t find my complex key.

Um. There were highlights in there somewhere, I swear!

Highlights: I very much enjoy making my meals for the day. I feel extremely empowered by slapping food in a tupperware container and carrying it with me like a sack lunch. POWER! The AAA was very nice and informative about not trusting mechanics to be honest. Saved me from getting duped! I think. I have fantastic co-workers who make work a breeze. I found a neat thrift store during my aimless travels. Also I bought a DS game for $3! Boom! I got very appreciated compliments in my dance class! Shucks! I believe I came out on top in the food struggle today. As the final hour of my terribly long 5 1/2 hours drew near, I figured it was time to get myself a snack for the evening so I wouldn’t go 5 more hours and this time with nothing on my stomach while dancing. So I bought more GF animal crackers (the cheapest and most plentiful option) and was surprised with the ongoing save $0.50 coupon! Yay! Also, my brother is my rock. My Grok rock. My victory today is for him. And Sharpie. Don’t ask. 🙂 Adapt or get dropped! Happy 1/2 birthday!

Struggles: . . .really? Must I? We’re having such a good time now.

MENU

  • LUNCH: Chicken tenders and veggie medley (I used a packet of non-paleo ketchup and soy sauce because that’s how quickly I ran out the door today. 80/20)
  • DINNER: Salad of spring mix and kale with carrots, avocado slices, and ham shreds
  • SNACK: GF animal crackers

On Today’s Menu: Monday February 3, 2014

BOOOOOORING! Such a boring day. Exactly what I needed. 🙂 Luckily I have two of these boring days in a row so everything I didn’t feel like doing today I can happily do tomorrow. Well, I guess tomorrow I’ll see how happily I do them. I suddenly realized there’s more to my chores than I thought of today.

Highlights: I ate well today despite the boredom meter going off the charts. I took care of the tear stains on Shana’s fur. I also made a friggin gorgeous ham and cheese omelet that I forgot to photograph. My bad. Oh, and I did a load of dishes. Oh, and I did a lot of social media fun stuff today. Very productive. Oh! And HOCKEY! I love when I get to watch my Devils play. I hate that I call them MY Devils. Blame the boyfriend. It’s entirely his fault.

Struggles: Being bored really makes me want to eat. Eating is terribly entertaining. I think my amazing grass fed burgers were slightly too undercooked. I’ve had a bit of a stomach ache all day since eating the last two today. It’s actually sitting just above my stomach like it’s heartburn. I’ve learned that any sensation in my stomach is immediately registered as a hunger pain first and foremost. Like eating will solve any pain problem in my gut. #formerfatgirlproblems #weightisnottheonlyindicatorofhealth I ate lunch at a weird hour so it was technically dinner I suppose, but like a really early dinner. But by the time I was hungry again it was already after 9. What’s the point of eating that late other than tempting heartburn? I’m not using that energy for anything.

MENU

  • BRUNCH: Ham and cheese omelet
  • DINNER: 2 grass fed burgers on a bed of kale and spring mix
  • SNACK: Larabar

EDIT: I ended up having a small salad with less than ideal balsamic vinaigrette because my stomach was rather unhappy. 80/20 allows me to live.

On Today’s Menu: Sunday, February 2, 2014

Another great day! I got up at 9ish and prepped lunch, dinner, AND snacks for today so I wouldn’t snack on bad things while I was out of the house literally all day. And it was a smooth run the whole time! Happy happy happy girl!

Also, the boyfriend is super nifty. He’s just tops, ladies and gents. The bees knees. That is all. Let’s talk highs and lows from which we build!

Highlights: Prepping my food for the day when I go out is so empowering! I had zero inclination to get anything I shouldn’t. Maybe the hard cider was the least good thing, but like I said: my 20% will at least be gluten free. There were many laughs at work at Puppetry which always makes for a good day regardless. At Horizon, every single ticket was picked up and every ticket was easily accounted for. That’s NEVER happened to me before! And then another phenomenal  burlyQ show! There’s so much love with those ladies and gents! I’m so inspired! But it’ll have to wait til morning. . .and after cleaning dishes and maybe doing laundry and organizing around here. Still, it feels amazing to feel inspired to do awesome things!

Struggles: Not much today. The typical cravings for the leftover doughnuts and the concessions cookies, but it was so quiet today that I can barely call it a struggle. Happy day! I got a little crave-y tonight after three Angry Orchards, but. . .GLUTEN FREE! And only ONE piece of dark chocolate once I got home (and some pinches of cheese). None of the Hershey’s kisses that were given out during the show or the box of chocolates I got during the show.

MENU

  • BREAKFAST: Ham and cheese from inside the Hormel REV wrap from the free Friday coupon
  • LUNCH: Ham, kale, carrots, and cheese wraps
  • SNACK: GF animal crackers
  • DINNER: Hot dogs, sauteed onions and peppers, mashed sweet potatoes
  • SNACK: Lara ALT bar, one square Lindt’s 70% chocolate, pinches of shredded cheese